Category Archives: Local

Comedy Games Internet Local

Call of Duty – Broadband Warfare 2

My broadband connection was on the blink this morning, which affected me less than it would usually would have because I had a dentist appointment, so I didn’t think too much of it. I heard on the radio when driving to said appointment that the whole island was affected so that made me feel a little better, and everything came back about an hour after I returned.

However a friend of mine works at one of the local telecoms companies (and which is also the broadband wholesaler to the others – kind of like our local version of BT) phoned me at lunchtime to ask if my connection was back, since he hadn’t seen me on Skype (I’d actually just forgotten to turn it back on). He informed me that the reason for the technical difficulties was a massive spike in internet traffic caused by everyone playing Call of Duty : Modern Warfare 2 :D

Yes, it seems lots of people decided to take the day off today to play the new release; even in our small juristiction over 100 people queued outside the local HMV at midnight to get their copy early, so it seems that many more people bought it at 9am and went home to fire it up. Given that the game had a day 1 patch (at least for PS3 for a trophy bug, I don’t know about 360) I presume that plus lots of people jumping online all at once was a bit much for the system to handle.

It appears I’m the only person in the world who isn’t obsessed with COD:MW2 ;)

Local Political

Living longer means working longer, obviously

So, in our local juristiction we’re finally having the discussion about retirement age, ie raising it to 67 by 2031, and probably higher than that later (not mentioned yet, but it’s bound to happen). Somehow, this is a shock to some people.

The fact is that the welfare system, retirement packages, and  even the economy in general were just not constructed on the understanding that an increasing number of people would be retired for up to one third of their life. The retirement age of 65 was set on the understanding that not everyone would make it, and those that did would maybe have 5-10 years, it just can’t cope with people being retired for 20-25 years on average, as it will almost certainly be in 20 years time.

I actually think 67 is being conservative – I’m personally expecting to have to work until I’m 70, and provided I still have my marbles, I’d actually welcome that in many ways; I do think that being active keeps you sharp, and work-related things for me are the best way to stay on the ball. I also think that we need to think differently about retirement; in the days of people living longer I don’t think a simplistic 2-speed arrangement – ‘work’ and ‘retirement’ – really fits with how people live anymore. In practice, a lot of people switch careers one or more times, quit and start businesses, take a gear shift when their kids grow up or their mortgage is paid off, all before ‘proper’ retirement, so how about supporting that kind of multi-stage transition in the ‘retirement’ structure? People in the armed forces or police have that sort of arrangement already; they generally retire from the service with a pension in their late forties or early fifties, and then carry on doing something else between then and state retirement, allowing them some level of security while still being economically active. That sort of ‘staged’ approach seems more suitable to me in a situation where people are living longer lives.

What’s clear though is that things can’t stay the way they are; people who thought the current retirement age could continue as it is were frankly being incredibly naive. In the end, would you rather:

  • Work longer
  • Pay higher taxes
  • Be forced to smoke 40-a-day, or partake in high-risk recreational activites to thin the ranks?

Them’s your choices ;)

Comedy Local Music

Spinal Tap coming here??

spinaltapOk, this is very, very bizarre. Having bought tickets for the last 2 years, I got an email letting me know that the local summer-time comedy festival was returning this year, so I went to take a look at the lineup. The stand-up lineup looks pretty good, I recognise a couple of the names, and in any case it’s good to see people  you haven’t come across before.

But, the main thing that gave me a “WTF?” moment was the banner in the middle, claiming that Spinal Tap were coming over on the 7th June, as part of their tour for the 25th anniversary of their 1984 spoof rockumentary This Is Spinal Tap. Dude, no way! I’m looking for the catch here, but it would seem that in fact, the appropriate response is “Way”.

I’m in two minds about this though. On the one hand, it would be very cool to see these guys in person – This Is Spinal Tap is a cult classic. On the other hand, it has been 25 years (wow), I’m not sure if seeing them now might be a bit disappointing, and they’re holding it in what is essentially a tiny venue, for only £5 a head. Maybe that’s part of the joke (given that TIST is all about a band with delusions of rock stardom that never quite make it), I don’t know. I guess it can’t hurt to go and see since it’s that cheap!

Since the ticket office doesn’t open until Friday, for now there’s nothing to do but celebrate the classic scene:

Local Music Personal

Guitar adjustments – maybe I don’t suck so bad after all

pacifica_oldviolinI recently took my electric guitar into our local shop to get it adjusted by the resident luthiers, since I’d noticed lately that it was tending to go sharp on higher frets even when tuned correctly. At first, I wasn’t sure if it was just me, since learning for a year on an acoustic meant I often tended to use too much force on the fretboard of the electric and introduced accidental bending (since the string gauges on the electric are lighter, and steel rather than bronze). After a while though, I became pretty convinced that it was getting more pronounced and that it wasn’t down to my lack of skill, although that still needs plenty of work too ;) .

So, I was introduced to the issue of humidity and how it affects the guitar, which I hadn’t been particularly aware of before (I vaguely remember reading about environmental conditions, but hadn’t had any problems with the acoustic). Obviously wood being organic, it absorbs water from the environment or loses it, and thus can change shape slightly, particularly as so much tension is involved, meaning the original set-up needed adjusting once it had settled into the prevailing conditions at my house. I got it back the next day and am extremely pleased with the result – no more sharps up the fretboard, and a slightly lower action too which makes it easier to play. I can now wail away without wincing at a dodgy sounding chord – well, not because of that, anyway. :) What was also nice was that they did it for free – I guess not that surprising since I only bought the guitar from them a couple of months ago, but still I wasn’t assuming that would be the case so I appreciated it, and it certainly vindicated my decision to buy locally rather than save a bit of cash ordering online. My aim now is to get good enough that when I feel like buying more guitars (which I’m beginning to realise is inevitable eventually if I keep this up), I can try them out in the shop without feeling self-conscious – difficult when the store owner demos the kit by cranking out some great-sounding licks then hands it over to you! I’m not quite up to banjo dueling just yet. :)

Business Development Local Open Source Political

Making a new home for patent trolls

I live on an island that often gets bad press for being a ‘tax haven’. Those in the local financial services industry don’t like that term of course, pointing out how standards-compliant the finance industry is, and how many information exchange agreements we have with other countries (the line ‘the lady doth protest too much’ bubbles to the surface in some people’s minds I’m sure at this stage). So, we’re not technically a tax haven according to the OECD definition, but we’re certainly a place for people to stash their money and avoid paying tax on the income they derive from it in the juristictions in which they live. There’s no getting around the wider political debates about whether that’s a morally respectable position to take, particularly that the reason taxes can be so low is that the state doesn’t have to pay for defense, which is sponged from the UK government, provides precious little in the way of healthcare, and generally takes a right-wing policy route that seems to actively promote social division, but let’s leave that for the moment. Obviously being somewhat of a left-leaner I find it all slightly distasteful and am quite grateful my career path has so far kept me doing other things. I don’t deride people for choosing to be involved in that business – it’s their choice, and certainly it pays better than most of the alternatives in a small locality, but for a little while now (certainly since developing my own political opinions rather than inheriting them from the community around me) I’ve felt much better to be ‘aligned’ with the goals of whatever organisation I’m spending my working time with. Seems to me that we spend so much of our lives working, it probably ought to be for something we actually believe in, and I personally can’t say I have any significant motivation to help people avoid paying tax. While I can, I’ll keep doing other things, although increasingly our local government doesn’t seem very interested in seriously promoting much else.

However, I have been dismayed with one of the latest developments locally which are supposedly ‘branching out’ beyond financial services, because it’s actually worse - our IP law has been revised now so that patents from any juristiction can be re-registered locally to obtain the same protection (previously, it only applied to IP registered in the UK  I believe). Simple enough, except that articles in our local news have been chest-beating about it specifically with reference to the fact that now, patents that wouldn’t be valid in the UK can now be registered, so long as they are valid in another juristiction – and in particular they singled out business method patents as registered in the US, which are currently not allowed in the UK. They’re happy that ‘asset holders’ can now ‘bolster their protection’ by re-registering their ‘IP’ even though the UK would have thrown it out as worthless.

Ugh. One of the things I was proud about in the UK is that bullshit patents on business methods weren’t valid. I was happy that total nonsense like the Amazon 1-Click patent and it’s ilk were deemed not to be valid inventions, for they are widely acknowledged to suppress innovation and play directly into the hands of patent trolls. The world is blighted by people who register widely known techniques as patents with a registrar who is so ignorant and/or compromised by conflicting interests that they’re incapable of acknowledging the prior art, and an entire industry wastes precious resources either fighting patent spam, or building their own equally rancid pile of patents as a self-defense mechanism, all instead of actually inventing significant things, or you know, making great products that stand up in their own right. If even half the time that went into the overheads of establishing, debating, licensing and fighting low-brow, pointless patents was spent on the creative process, who knows how much we’d actually advance the human race. Instead, that effort gets spent on lawyers instead – it’s no wonder that the people lauding these ‘advances’ are from that particular profession.

At a time when everyone else, even big companies like Microsoft in the US, are recognising that software / business method patents are proving corrosive to the industry, locally our law makers are puffing themselves up over having allowed such nonsense to happen here too.

But hey, it’ll make a quick buck, both for the registrar and for our local legal firms, so it’s ok right? Favouring the financially convenient over the holistically respectable seems a common line around here. I despair sometimes.

Local Personal

The White Stuff

We don’t get ‘proper’ snow very often here (gulf stream, island salt air etc), so it was a surprise to wake up to about 3-4 inches on the ground this morning. Unsurprisingly, our completely unprepared community has ground to a complete halt, in conditions any Russian or Canadian would find laughable.

It doesn’t stop me from going to work of course, or my wife who also only has a short walk to work. Our environmentally friendly lifestyle clearly doesn’t pay dividends in this particular instance.

I’m also now finding that my internet speeds are in post-school molasses mode, I guess because so many people are either home working or just killing time on the net today. So snow clearly clogs up the intertubes too :?

Local Political

Remember who elected you

I generally don’t have a lot of time for politicians. I’m of the opinion that a large number of those who actively pursue political power are also the ones least suitable to wield it, and that even the few that enter the halls of power with the best of ideals will have most of them eroded away within a few years, or be largely marginalised.

I live in a jurisdiction which has leaned towards a conservative approach to government for decades (our island has it’s own government, separate from the UK). Early on in life I just kind of assumed political conservatism was a normal, sensible approach that was probably for the best – after all I grew up during the Thatcher years. However, as I’ve matured and gained more life experience, I’ve become more liberal in my views and have come to realise that I disagree fundamentally with many aspects of traditional, right-wing conservatism. I’m far from a militant, banner-waving leftie, but I definitely have a greater sense of my own political opinion, rather than taking what other supposedly ‘knowledgeable’ people say on face value, and whilst I consider myself mostly in the centre ground, if I lean anywhere at all it’s slightly to the left.

I’ve talked about the banking crisis a little on this blog already, but this week it very much came home to roost in our little rock when Landsbanki Guernsey was taken into administration, a victim of the general meltdown in Icelandic financial affairs. I don’t have any money in Landsbanki thank goodness, but a lot of ordinary local people did, as well as many ex-pats. Now, banks are failing in other places too, but for the most part ordinary personal depositors have been protected in those circumstances, either through ad-hoc political guarantees (Ireland led the way here), or existing depositor protection schemes.  However, Guernsey has no depositors protection scheme, and no ability to make an ad-hoc guarantee since despite the huge amounts of money sloshing about in trust funds here, next to none of it generates tax revenue (only local people pay tax), which means that at least in theory, personal depositors stand to lose every penny of their life savings. These aren’t millionnaires, for the most part they’re ordinary people who have worked really hard for their nest egg. Now, they almost certainly won’t lose everything (although it’s very unlikely that they’ll get it all back I think) but the point is that they have absolutely no idea what to expect – the most they’ve had is wishy-washy attempts at calming their nerves from some politicians that frankly are worth less than the newspaper they’re printed in.

The fact is that uncertainty is to a large part responsible for the current financial mess, and a lack of a depositor protection scheme just adds to that. It’s incredible to think we’re one of the few places in the world not to have one of these schemes, despite supposedly being a ‘respected financial centre’ – the idea has been floated in the past, particularly after such collapses as Barnett Christie and BCCI in the 70s and 80s, but in the end nothing happened; the reason being that the banks didn’t much feel like setting up such a scheme, since it obviously has a cost implication for them. Our government, which has become utterly dependent on the financial industry, ultimately didn’t want to rock the boat and quietly let the issue drop. Their excuse for such negligence has been that ‘no-one could have predicted this crisis’ which even if we ignore the precedents already set by other collapsing banking institutions, is frankly entirely missing the point; it’s like saying that you’re not at fault for not taking out house insurance, because you couldn’t have predicted your house would catch fire. It’s drivel. The simple fact is they didn’t want to upset their industry backers, and just hoped that it wouldn’t happen again, despite historical evidence to suggest such things were an inevitability as cycles come and go.

Our government has for years now bowed to pretty much whatever the financial services industry wanted, in order to keep them happy. While the stance is completely understandable to a degree, some people (myself included) believe it’s been taken too far in recent years. A case in point is that our entire taxation system was changed this year solely in order to satisfy the needs of this sector; an enormous, costly and disruptive task which also now places the taxation system on a footing that requires considerable year-on-year local growth to avoid having to raise additional taxes from the common man. This was always a dubious gamble given that, as an island, we’re limited by land and population – clearly many members of financial sector lobbying groups couldn’t give a damn about whether they caused even more overpopulation and relative poverty problems, so long as they can keep the money rolling in. But now, with a protracted recession looking likely, these already rather optimistic growth targets look impossible, and that will ultimately require a ‘rethink’ – which is political speak for finding ways to raise more tax from everyday residents (since non-residents pay no tax no matter how much money they make through investments here).

Personally, I say it’s time to re-evaluate our priorities. Government is elected by regular people, and this is who they need to answer to first, not to lobby groups from particular industries. There have been years of decision making based on the premise that by keeping the rich (sorry, ‘high net worth individuals’) happy, the rest of the population will benefit from the trickle-down effect. That’s certainly true up to a point, but there is always a delicate balance to be maintained to avoid going from making sensible trade-offs for mutual benefit, to allowing bare-faced exploitation, and in my opinion at some point in the last few years we tipped over it. There seem to be a few politicians in our government that see this, but they are so far in the minority. Maybe when others have to face down members of the electorate who have lost their savings because of a decision that was made in the interests of industry rather than the people who gave them their jobs, it will start to finally dawn on them.

Comedy Local

Stand up, again

The Guernsey Festival of Comedy was great last year, and so we snapped up tickets to this year’s local stand-up event, since the only other way we’d get to see acts like this is to travel to a major city. Paul Tonkinson was headlining this year which made it a no-brainer, we’ve seen him on the Comedy Store before and he’s always excellent.

As expected it was a great night, Paul didn’t disappoint in the slightest and thus crowned the evening off perfectly, but the other acts were really good too. In particular Janice Phayre, whom we hadn’t seen before, but who I can best describe as a hyperactive ball of slightly filthy Irish comedy energy. Great stuff.

There were actually some empty seats this time around which was surprising, and I hear that they still have some spare tickets for one or other of Saturday’s performances (Friday is sold out), so if you’re local and you haven’t been yet, I highly recommend it.

And just on a weird tangent, while searching for an image for this post I randomly came across The Bezathon. Awesome :)

Internet Local Tech

My ADSL speed creeps upward, almost at 2005 levels now

I’ve often bitched about my connection to the intertubes being pretty slow compared to what is generally expected in the current times. As average download speeds have increased, I’ve found myself going to sites that assume faster download speeds than I have, and thus having to pause & come back to videos when they’ve buffered more to avoid an irritating stop-start experience (note to flash players that only allow buffering of a little bit of a video – shame on you). I jumped on the broadband wagon in 2001 at a downstream speed of 512k/s, and until now, in the intervening 6 and a bit years, the speed has only increased once to 1M/s. That’s pretty piss-poor, but the reality is that we’re an island, and even though we’ve been getting increased capacity via fibre-optic cable links to Europe, our shores are clogged with offshore finance businesses and gambling websites from other juristictions (hosted here for regulatory reasons) who are quite willing to soak up all this extra bandwidth through dedicated circuits at incredibly inflated prices, so the average consumer has been mostly forgotten.

Well, we’ve been tossed a bone finally and my downstream speed has now increased to 2M/s (unlimited), which is certainly welcome, but incredibly late and still below par considering I pay £22 per month for it – in comparison in the UK O2 will do 16M/s (unlimited) for £15pm. A quick test at SpeedTest.net (off-peak) indeed reported a decent performance, slightly off the max reported by my router:

I’m not sure why it thinks my ISP is in Slough, but there you go. The important fact, something I’ve banged on about for some time to our intransigent infrastructure supplier (Cable & Wireless, now rebranded as ‘Sure’ locally, which ironically is my exact response whenever their PR dept claims they’re building a ‘world class telecoms system’), is that we’re still running at about half the average speed of the UK and Europe, which is still pitiful. Yeah, I know there’s the island aspect, but that cuts both ways – the cables never have far to go here, certainly compared to the UK/Europe averages which include distant rural areas – even my parents can get up to 6.5M/s where they live, and they’re in a tiny village in rural Cornwall.  Plus, there’s also a captive market locally sloshing with shedloads of money from rich finance houses and related high-value services, which can easily fund investment – if there’s one place you could build a modern telecommunications infrastructure, it’s somewhere like this. But, they either can’t, or they’re not interested in doing so (for consumers), given that they can make their sackfuls of money from business links, and consumer services are small beer. That’s also why it’s almost impossible to rent a server cost-effectively over here, they’re only interested in (gambling) companies that will rent several racks at a time, small customers are irrelevant to them. Luckily that market is global – I can host pretty much anywhere and get a deal 10x better than I can locally – but when it comes to my local internet connection, I’m stuck with what we have.

I’m holding out for one of the competitors to put up a few high-speed wireless transmitters covering the whole island (not that difficult), using the bandwidth from the extra optical cable they’ve brought ashore in recent weeks, and completely bypass the physical cabling system that ‘Sure’ controls – maybe that will finally shake them out of their torpor and make them appreciate the consumer market again. But, my cynical mind thinks it’s more likely they’ll also chase the business customers first anyway since it has a greater return. Hmm.

Local Open Source

Hibernate, presented

I reprised my former role as ‘wizened business software guru’ last night by giving a presentation to my local developer community on Hibernate, the Java-based object-relational mapping system (ORM). I really like Hibernate; not only has it got an enormous amount of features, and performs really well, but it’s also built on very sound design principles. As someone who has used several ORMs in the past, and written a couple of my own going back a decade or so, I can appreciate the thought that has gone into it.

I think it went down pretty well – I discovered I had a bit too much to cover when I did a timing dry-run so had cut a few things out at the last minute, but I still had to get my skates on to keep it at around an hour – I hope people didn’t feel too bombarded. I really just wanted to get across just how mature frameworks like Hibernate are; most of the local developers are .Net-oriented and thus being a fan of Java for business software I sometimes feel I have to defend it, now that it’s no longer ‘trendy’ – it may not have all the latest language-level gimmicks, but in terms of robust, tested and feature-laden frameworks it still leads the pack – if you’re building something non-trivial I don’t think there’s a better place to do it. I think it’s easy to concentrate too much on low-level language issues (which .Net scores very highly on indeed), and not enough on the wider supporting ecosystem – language tricks and tool integration make a development environment feel more productive, but there’s simply nothing more productive than not having to write the code in the first place! Java still gives me the most confidence that I can just use plenty of existing standards and frameworks and assemble a decent sized application without hitting things that aren’t finished yet. Plus, I like that it’s fully cross-platform with a huge amount of open source support of course. I briefly covered NHibernate (.Net port of Hibernate) at the end of the talk, which like most .Net ports of Java software lags behind the original and misses a few features, but is still probably one of the best ORMs you can get in that environment at the moment. LINQ to Entities may eventually squash it of course, once it matures enough – again I have to shake my head at Microsoft’s ‘Not Invented Here’ attitude that will cause them to have to recreate all of NHibernate’s features, and thus put their users through a year or more of shaky maturation, compared to if they just adopted, wrapped, enhanced, or provided support for NHibernate. But we know they don’t play well with others ;)

I was pleased to see a couple of people from our local Mac store came along too, who had apparently done some Java coding before. I actually did the entire presentation (including demo) on my MacBook Pro using Open Office and Eclipse – gotta love cross-platform, open-source software. I developed both the code and presentation hopping back and forth between Windows and OS X, depending where I happened to be on any given day – I love that I can do that seamlessly with these tools. And of course Eclipse is a delight to use, one of the few tools around that can beat the living daylights out of Visual Studio.

I managed to squeeze in a few bits of from-the-trenches design advice along the way to explain why I’d advise doing things certain ways – and I was quite surprised at the number of blank faces when I brought up things like the Law of Demeter and the n+1 selects antipattern. I guess I’m a bit of a design geek anyway, but this is the sort of stuff that really does affect software quality and performance in decent sized application, so I hope the nuggets were useful to someone.

Anyone who wants to look at the slides can do so here. To recreate the entire experience, just imagine a short bearded guy talking way too fast and waving his arms about. ;)